Tuesday, January 15, 2008

Television The Drug Of A Nation

So I spent some time on ye olde tube tonight. Actually quite a bit of time. I keep it on while I'm working on the computer sometimes in place of music. And tonight I logged me some hours.

Here's what I "learned", in no particular order.

Republicans are fucked (3 primaries, 3 winners...kinda rules.)

Going green with Ethanol is raising beer prices up. So listen to this. Since Ethanol is all the rage now and it's made from corn, farmers are jumping on the bandwagon and growing more corn than barley and hops. In turn, hops and barley are decreasing in availability and therefore INCREASING in demand and price. Some prices for hops have risen 300%! By the time it hits the streets, wholesale kegs for bars will be 5 dollars more and up to a dollar more for a god damned six pack at the Kwik Stop.

Dude. Celebrity Rehab was crrrrrrrrrrazy. What the fuck. I couldn't believe my eyes and ears. I couldn't stop watching. I scrambled to get stuff done on commercial breaks. You have to see this. Ok, China , from WWF, is disgusting. She looks so gross. All greasy. Listen here Mr. China, you are NOT a gal. Ok, Shifty Shellshock!! I NEVER thought I'd see this fool again. He's all smoking crack before he goes in...on camera. And then he takes two Red Stripes into rehab!! Haha. Ladies, he's still super hot in a beachy, tool like, totally buff, bad mohawk and tattoo kind of way. Do you remember the ugly guy from Grease and TAXI? Jeff Conaway? This guy. This once proud, yet extremely ugly man has reduced himself to mush. He's a crying, helpless piece of embarrassing shit. A broken and worthless man. He shows up all high on the heroin or whatever. And a lil' Jack to wash it down with. The funny thing is I only watched about 15 minutes. I had to do some shit, so I missed like 45 minutes of GOLD and I'm STILL hooked.

Lastly, a 10 year old hasidic jew was raped by his 14 year old classmate, prison style, on Law & Order SUV. Eh NOISHE.

1 comment:

Melissa XO said...

Also, did you hear that the fda approved cloned meat to be sold in grocery stores. And, they WON'T be labled as such.